UNDYING: A Bad Boy MMA Romance (Midwest Alphas) (Book 3) Read online

  “Tob—” I cough it out, choking between breaths as I stumble and fall to my knees in front of him.

  He turns around slowly and I realize that it’s not Tobias at all.

  I stare up into his green eyes and scream as he erupts into a wall of fire.

  ***

  “Hey, Charlie,” I say into my phone. “Is everything okay?”

  I listen for his response as I stare up at the hotel ceiling, squinting at the morning light seeping in through cracks in the curtains. Amy breathes softly in the bed next to mine, completely lost to the world, or at least she will be for another ten minutes until her alarm goes off. I’ve been up for hours, tossing and turning outside of sleep’s grip.

  The nightmares have returned. I can still smell the smoke attached to the inside of my nostrils.

  “As good as can be expected, I guess,” Charlie answers. “You were right, your mother has a tail on her and it won’t be easy to lose them.”

  “Do you think you can?”

  “I’m honestly not sure. They seem well-trained.”

  I bite my lip. “Thanks for trying, Charlie.”

  “Luckily, they haven’t noticed that they themselves are being watched. So, while trained, they are not too bright.”

  I chuckle. “Pretty much sums up the Kings, I think.”

  “My guys in Kansas City will find a window of opportunity and we’ll get her out,” he says. “Don’t worry, Claire.”

  I lean back against the headboard. “Have you ever dealt with something like this before?” I ask.

  “Once.”

  “How did it end?”

  He pauses. “Try and stay positive, Claire.”

  I close my eyes, refusing to imagine why he chose that response above all others. “Is it all right if I call her?”

  “Sure,” he says. “But first… how are you doing?”

  “Oh, same old, I guess…”

  “Claire… same old with you isn’t exactly reassuring.”

  “I’m fine, Charlie,” I say. “The last few days have been a little rough, but I’m keeping it together.”

  “Well, if that changes, you call me. We’ll have one of our chats.”

  A laugh breaks through me. “I kind of missed those…”

  “Me, too, kid.” He sighs. “Go ahead and call your mother. She’s been wanting to hear from you.”

  “Okay. Thanks, Charlie.”

  “Take care of yourself, Claire.”

  I hang up and immediately dial the number for our not-so-secret apartment. It rings twice before she answers with a stiff yawn. “Mom? Sorry if I woke you.”

  “Oh, honey,” she says. “Who the hell could sleep at a time like this?”

  “I know what you mean…” I lean down against my pillows, finding comfort in her voice. “Are you okay? It’s a dumb question, but…”

  “I’m okay,” she answers. “I was doing awful but then Charlie brought me a gun. I used to hate these things, but now I’m quite the fan.”

  I chuckle. “They won’t hurt you, Mom. As long as I keep my promise, they won’t touch you.”

  “Well, I’m not taking any chances. Did Charlie tell you about the secret knock? We have a secret knock for the door. Isn’t that cool?”

  “Wouldn’t be much of a secret knock if he did tell me about, Mom.”

  “Oh, right.”

  Amy’s phone beeps loudly, instantly stirring her awake. She sits up in bed with bright eyes and kicks her blanket away; forever the morning person.

  “Mom, I have to go. I just wanted to hear from you that you were okay…”

  “Oh, I’ve got bodyguards and guns,” she jokes. “Mommy’s gonna be just fine.”

  “That’s good…” I smile.

  “I know it’s hard, honey,” she says, “but at least you’re with Tobias now, right?”

  “Yeah,” I mutter, feeling the sharp stab to my heart. “At least I’m with Tobias.”

  ***

  I push the curtains apart and peek out into the bright, winter wonderland outside. Our hotel room is on the tenth floor, giving me a pretty good view of the city completely obscured by a blanket of snow and ice. I’d give anything to be a child again and have a chance to actually enjoy it. Out of school. No responsibilities. Just me in a huge coat and gloves, making snow angels and throwing snowballs at friends until my mother pokes her head out to tell me to come back inside for hot cocoa and Charlie Brown specials.

  The bathroom door opens and Amy steps out, perfectly clothed and dolled up, along with a subtle cloud of her body spray. She brushes a hand through her freshly-curled locks and stares at me in my pajamas. “Not coming again today?” she asks.

  I shake my head.

  “Well,” she sighs, “you know what I have to say about that.”

  “The same thing you said yesterday?”

  “Yep.”

  “Tobias doesn’t need me bothering him right now,” I mutter. I close the curtain and fall back onto the bed.

  “And Ryan hates me. Doesn’t stop me from doing my job.”

  “Which is?”

  She sighs. “Running an illegal underground MMA tournament.”

  “Well, if you’re lucky, you won’t have to run it for much longer…”

  I twitch as her petite form suddenly appears over my head. She stares down at me with firm, angry eyes, a startling counter to the pink eyeshadow brushed along her lids. “Ten more minutes,” she says, her hands straddling my shoulders.

  “What?”

  “I’m going to give you ten more minutes of this crap. Then, I want you up, I want you showered, dressed, and smiling, because you’re coming back to work with me today.”

  “Amy—”

  “Lillian would have never allowed this and neither will I,” she continues. “Claire Holloway can mourn her life all she wants. Claire the Alpha Dame has shit to do.” She pushes off and stands back up. “You want the Alphas to win this thing or not?”

  “Yes, I do—”

  “Then get off your ass and help.”

  “What can I do?” I ask, propping myself up onto my elbows.

  “Strap on your wings, little birdie,” she says. “Our men need us.”

  “For what?”

  She shrugs. “I don’t know. I just know Pike made me promise to quote get her ass over here today unquote.”

  “You’re doing that quote unquote thing a lot…”

  “Don’t change the subject.”

  I sigh and kick off my blanket. “Fine.”

  “That’s my girl.”

  ***

  I step into the gym and stomp my shoes against the floor to knock the snow off my heels. When I look up, I notice Tobias glancing in my direction from inside the ring. His eyes quickly turn away as I slide my coat off my shoulders, focusing on Ryan as he throws a punch towards his jaw. I flinch, almost feeling the pain on my own face, but Tobias dodges the blow with ease.

  “You’re not leaving this ring until one of those punches connects, Ryan,” Pike shouts.

  “He’s too fast…” Ryan says, nearly out of breath.

  “Then be faster.” Pike peers down at me and wipes a line of sweat from bleeding down into his eyes. “Tobias, if he hits you, you run laps around the building.” He hops down from the ring and steps over to me.

  “Who exactly are you rooting for up there?” I ask him, confused.

  “Come with me,” he says without breaking his stride towards the back. “Amy, keep them moving.”

  “Okay!” she shouts back.

  Once again, I catch Tobias looking in my direction from the corner of his eye before I follow Pike. He waits for me by the door with his fingertips clasped about the handle. I step inside and look up the dark stairwell as he closes the door behind us.

  “After you,” he gestures upward. I grip the railing, barely hanging on by stripped screws, and stroll up the stairs to the top floor. Pike flicks a light switch as we reach the landing, illuminating a small, studio apartment.


  “You live up here?” I ask, glancing around. There’s a bed in the far corner, the sheets gently tossed to make it appear to be “made,” along with a small kitchen and writing desk against the wall. It’s all very bare, like a prison cell, without an ounce of comfort, although, I’m not exactly surprised.

  “Sure,” he answers.

  “Look, I’m not here to distract anybody, okay?” I say, watching as he reaches down to open the top drawer of his desk. “I’ll sit in the corner and be quiet. I promise.”

  Pike holds out his hand to me and I flinch to see Rick’s switchblade folded up in his palm. “Here.”

  I lean away from it. “I don’t want that…”

  “Just take it, Claire.” He pushes his hand a little closer to me.

  I reach out slowly and pick it up. “Why are you giving me this?”

  “Because you might need it,” he answers. “It’s not exactly my weapon of choice, but I think it suits you.”

  I flick it open and the scent of bleach invades my nostrils. “You certainly cleaned it…” I note, coughing softly.

  “Do you know how to use one?”

  “You just thrust the pointy end, right?”

  He takes a quick step closer. “Stab me.”

  I blink, nearly dropping the thing to the floor. “Stab you?”

  “Yes.”

  “I’m not going to stab you, Pike.”

  “I know you’re not,” he says, rolling his eyes, “but I want you to try.”

  “Why?”

  “Just do it.”

  I curl my fingers over the handle, suddenly very aware of my movements. I debate for a moment whether or not to stab underhand or overhand. I suppose it doesn’t matter. His eyes pay close attention to me, flicking up and down my body with each subtle move I make. I raise the knife and he shakes his head.

  “This is painful to watch…”

  I drop my hand to my side. “Well, what do you expect?”

  “I expect a fucking Alpha Dame,” he says. “You’re better than this. What happened to that spunky girl that head-butted me? You almost broke my nose.”

  I fold the knife closed. “She’s a little out of practice.”

  “I’m not Tobias, Claire. I’m not going to go out of my way to protect you.”

  “Gee, thanks…”

  “Because…” he continues with stern eyes, “I absolutely believe you’re capable of saving yourself when the time comes. You just need the right tool and I can’t think of anything more poetic than killing that son-of-a-bitch with his own damn knife. Worst case scenario, of course.”

  I give the knife back to him. “I’m not going to kill him, Pike. He’s holding my mother hostage. If anything happens to him, I lose her.”

  “So what?” he asks. I raise an eyebrow. “Oh, right. I forgot that some people actually like their mothers.” He extends his hand again. “Still — take it. Might come in handy.”

  He waits, refusing to back down until I take it from his palm again. “How’s Tobias doing?” I ask as I slip it into my back pocket.

  “Yeah…” he mutters. “Sorry, kid. I’m not your go-between.” He turns back to the stairs, but quickly pauses to look back at me. “Actually…” He chews the corner of his mouth in concentration. “Come with me.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I just thought of a way for you to actually be useful to me.” He points at the desk. “Top drawer. Bring the blindfold.”

  I turn to open the drawer and find a red, satin blindfold stuffed into the back of it. “Why do you have a blindfold in your desk?” He fires a wink at me before descending the stairs. “Ugh, never mind.” I pinch the thing between two fingers and follow him back down onto the main floor.

  Pike climbs into the ring and I look at the endless sparing match still in progress. “Ryan, take a break.”

  Ryan drops his fists to his sides. “Oh, thank god…” He heaves before sliding between the ropes.

  “Claire, get in here,” Pike says, gesturing for me to join them.

  “What are you doing?” Tobias asks him, sweating pouring off his brow.

  I pull myself up and bend down to ease through the ropes. Pike snatches the blindfold from my hand and steps behind me to wrap it around my head. I cringe as he does it, quickly losing every last bit of light in my vision until I stand in total darkness. He grabs my shoulders and maneuvers me a few steps back. “Stand here. Don’t move.”

  “What are you doing?” Tobias asks him again.

  “It’s easy to throw a punch,” Pike says. “It’s easy to throw all of your strength and power against your opponent, but it’s not easy to stop once you’ve started.” I feel him move around me until he rests beside us. “Hit her.”

  “What?!” I reach for the blindfold, but Pike forces my hands back down.

  “Pike, what the hell is this?” Tobias asks.

  “It’s an agility exercise,” he answers.

  “I don’t need agility exercises. Let her go.”

  “Yes, you do need agility exercises, and no, not until you hit her.”

  I step away, but again, Pike pulls me back into place. “I’d like to point out that I have a history of abuse and this makes me really uncomfortable…”

  “We all do, Claire,” he says. “That doesn’t matter right now.”

  “Please,” I beg.

  “Let her go, Pike!”

  Pike lays his hands on my shoulders. “Claire, you know better than anyone else here the affect you have on Tobias.”

  “What does that have to do with blindfolding me?”

  “Last year, as you pointed out before, he nearly slit my throat but he looked into your eyes and he stopped. He glanced up for a moment during his fight against Marcus, caught your eyes across the room, and he stopped. A few days ago, he attacked me, but then he looked into your eyes and — low and behold — he stopped.”

  “So he has a conscience — unlike you.”

  He exhales. “This isn’t about having a conscience. It’s about timing and reflex. You can throw all the punches in the world, but the difference between winning and losing is often the one you don’t throw or, in the case of this exercise, the one you throw, but don’t follow through. Your eyes are often the only thing that pulls him back, but can he pull himself back without them?”

  “We can use a punching bag for this, Pike,” Tobias seethes.

  “But then you have no incentive to get it right the first time and we’re on a tight schedule here.” Pike drops his hands from my shoulders. “I think your Dame would agree with that, right, Claire?”

  I take a breath to ease my quaking nerves. This tournament is only two days away. I can’t waste time thinking like his girlfriend. I am his Dame and right now, that is more important. “Let’s just get this over with,” I whisper.

  “Claire—”

  “Just do it, Tobias. I trust you.”

  He sighs and I hear him shift into his fighting stance in front of me. I squeeze my eyes tighter, embracing the darkness until my vision lights up with fire. Pike grips my shoulders from behind again and I cringe, reminded of the ash-covered hands from my nightmares wiping their soot all over me. I stand up tall and lock my muscles. If I move even an inch, it could mean the pain of his fist.

  “Make it count,” Pike growls at Tobias behind my ear. “If I sense you’re holding back, I’ll just make you do it again.”

  I hear the punch whooshing through the air towards me. My knees spasm involuntarily, knocking me off-balance, but Pike holds me in place as Tobias’ knuckles stop short of my cheek. I feel the sweat on them, the heat of him just barely grazing my skin.

  “Good,” Pike says, dropping his hands from me. “That wasn’t so hard, was it?” His feet stomp across the mat and I hear him push the ropes aside to leave.

  I raise my shaking fingers to my eyes and blindly search for the knot behind my head.

  “Here…” Tobias whispers and reaches around me to untie it himself. I pull the blindfold free an
d it falls to my feet. “Are you okay?” he asks. His green eyes search mine, reflecting my own inner torment back at me.

  “I’m fine,” I say, my voice quivering so badly, I can hardly get the words out.

  His hand finds my cheek. “I’m so sorry.”

  “It’s not your fault. He wasn’t wrong. I’ve always been your weakness.”

  Tobias’ chest rises and falls with his deep breath. “I don’t see you that way. You shouldn’t either.”

  “Then why push me away?”

  He pauses. “Claire, I—”

  “Never mind…” I take a step back, pulling free from his touch. “I didn’t mean to distract you.” His expression doesn’t change. I force my eyes away, staring at my feet as I navigate back to the main floor with shaking knees.

  Amy stands nearby with her hand clutched against her throat. Her face stares at me, pale and frightened, positively stunned into silence — a rare sight if there ever was one. “Are you okay?” she whispers at me.

  “I’m fine,” I repeat as I grab my coat and slide it back on my shoulders.

  “Where are you going?”

  “Nowhere,” I say, lowering myself down onto a bench. “I’m just feeling a bit cold all of a sudden.”

  “What an asshole.” She stares across the room at Pike. “I could have him banned again, you know.”

  I shake my head, forcing a small laugh to brush it off. “Don’t worry about it.” I look up to find him glancing at me for the briefest of moments before he turns back to assist Ryan with his form.

  Pike is a lot of things — asshole consistently rising to the top of that list — but I don’t blame him for his drastic style. My heart pounds in my chest, revisiting a fear I haven’t felt in ages. It’s a grim reminder of the life I escaped, the one I left behind and swore I’d never return to, but a welcome reminder as well. Blood fires through my veins, awakening every urge I have within me to win this battle. I look at Pike again, realizing that it was part of his plan from the start.

  He’s not just training Tobias and Ryan for this fight.

  He’s training me, too.

  “Let’s go,” Pike announces. “There’s a lot to get done today and we’re taking tomorrow off.”

  “Tomorrow?” I ask, looking at Amy for an explanation. She opens her mouth to answer, but Pike talks over her.